Studying with heri watched as she slowly walked into McDonalds, towards me. i remember the messages i sent to get her to come down and study with me. Perhaps its just me, but i sense reluntancy. Paranoia can get you seriously bogged down. My head was heaving from the thoughts, a mess of confusion and untruths dwindled into a small little gem i call lies. She slowly walked towards me, her clothes anew from after school. i was in my fun-o-rama shirt, complete with a baggy pants, totally sloven in comparison to her.As we all know by now, i couldnt speak a word to her. Yes, i could speak in monotone, but thats about it. Perhaps i still have that small bit of infactuation for her. So the first few minutes of that meeting was awkard, silent and totally baboomy. i looked at her, as i slowly did my organic chemistry. I couldnt do a question, and so i asked her. And the ball has started rolling. It was apparent to me, and to her, that i was totally lacking of knowledge. the only thing i could do was to ask her questions, and i couldnt answer her questions. With the promos coming up in eight days, one can not help but feel scared. Perhaps i was just being empty in the head, and not being able to process any information. So time slowly passed, as i did my organic chemistry. Then i went to do physics. And then i went to do maths, And then i started to slack. She was doing her physics, and i believe was the only one doing work. Unlike me, she was focused. until some group of people came with some game. i forgotten what was the game, but it was something similar to UNO stacko. So she was busy just doing, and watching the people playing, laughing at their silliness. I made a joke about how this could turn into a reality TV show, and she would be one of the million people hooked onto the TV, watching this group of people play this stacking game. Hilarious, i should say. The group of people then started taking photos, seemingly hundreds of them. I couldnt help but roll my eyes, at her inane comments about how the group of people could have just taken one or two photos, but not a dozen ones. i had relaxed by then, and was slowly reverting to my former crappy self. Problem is, she doesnt handle crap as openly as the other people. I could crap, and all she would do is just roll her eyes, and a word of whatever would signal to me that "you should stop you know." i remember the past, when i used to crap to her, and she would laugh like a mad woman watching a small little bunny get run over by a car. Wrong metaphor, but who cares? I remember how we could talk like friends, and i wouldnt feel that sense of discomfort. We all make mistakes, and that session made me realise that mistakes are hard to die, and that live like immortals, forever following your thoughts in your head. Justin ranted at 11:31:00 am on the |