Sometimesit just takes a small song, songs lyrically amazing to expose your feelings, and to take your mind away from things that matters. It makes you think about yourself, and your talents. Somehow, you would want to try and live up to that, to emulate the genius in the songs, to practice the way they build up beautiful melody, to sing your hearts out, and to imagine yourself, just this once, a perfect being that is being imitated and praised upon by your imagination and fantasy.yet. it too just take a small song, songs lyrically insane, to drive your factual side away, to make you dance wildly to the beats and bass of the harmony. To drive in the cacophony and sing nonsensical words just trying to follow the strong pulsating rythmn. To just imagine yourself, just this once, a terrible rock idol, admired and immortalised by every single person in your dreams. But. It never takes a small song to drive away reality of life. Even in the power that music itself derive from the humanity inside all of us, it is impossible to absoultely forgo away the pain inside your heart, the breaking sweat of immunity falling apart to reveal your fragile glass wall, that starts to crack with every breath you take. Yes, your emotions are certainly changing for the better, you smile, and you cheer long, you dance, and you strum. But inside, the onslaught, the massive torrent of thoughts is just held back by your soundwaves. Nothing else. Its not erased, and its not disappearing. Its just being held down, and ironically, the longer you hold it down, the stronger it will seem when the dam breaks. You never want to believe that you are weak, yet weak we are. We appear strong, and tell everyone, dammit guy, i am strong. But inside, you are like a child, needing the touch of a human, the praises of everyone, the attention of the world. I once had a huge quarrel with my mum. And it was during this time when i was sick. Somehow, i was there angry with my mum, yet i was hoping inside myself, that she would come and care for me with love, hoping for the warm touch. Even when she comes, i would ignore her, angry inside, but once she left, i was hollow. Its strange, how we would defend ourself in the wrong way, and do the wrong thing, when what we hope would happen is actually the right and correct thing. Humanity is strange, and neither will we ever understand ourselves. Sometimes. Just sometimes. I wish i could for once fufill a single wish of mine. Just for day, i wish i could see love start to permeate the world, and the lines of fate that is drawn across everyone's time. I wanted the world to be perfect. And perfect it is. We are all perfect imperfection. The only thing perfect is our flaws. Never changing, and always right, our flaws dictate the way we behave and response to certain things, certain events. Why do people strive for perfection when its already what we have? To be perfectly flawed is a beauty in itself, the experience and the trauma, the happiness and the sorrow, the rapture, and the mirth, the sadness, everything that comes from it, is all beautiful when you look back and appreciate the repurcussion and ramifications. To be perfectly happy, and never feel pain is not to be human. To never experience cursed emotions like anger and jealousy, is to never be human. We would just be mindless happy robots programmed to smile at every single other intelligent automaton. It is sometimes, sometimes, this cursed emotions that drive us to do things that amaze even ourselves. Like shock, and anger. I remember a story about this parent who was shock to see his child crushed under a car, and in this state of confusion, he lifted up the car, and drag his child out. Soon there after, he tried again to lift up the car, but he couldnt anymore. Sometimes. Just sometimes. I wish we could realise that inside, all of us, underneath all that superficial flaw and biasness, we are all perfect. Sometimes. Sometimes. Justin ranted at 11:45:00 am on the |