The Verve pipe - The FreshmenWhen I was young I knew everything
And she a punk who rarely ever took advice
Now I'm guilt stricken, sobbin' with my head on the floor
Stop a baby's breath and a shoe full of rice, no...
I can't be held responsible
'Cause she was touching her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place
For the life of me I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me I cannot believe we'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen
My best friend took a week's vacation to forget her
His girl took a week's worth of valium and slept
And now he's guilt stricken sobbin' with his head on the floor
Thinks about her now and how he never really wept he says
I can't be held responsible
'Cause she was touching her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place
For the life of me I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me I cannot believe we'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen
We've tried to wash our hands of all of this
We never talk of our lacking relationships
And how we're guilt stricken sobbin' with our heads on the floor
We fell through the ice when we tried not to slip, we'd say
I can't be held responsible
'Cause she was touching her face
And I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place
For the life of me I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me I cannot believe we'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen
For the life of me I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me I cannot believe we'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen
We were merely freshmen
We were merely freshmen
We were only freshmen
Suddenly, this old 1997 song just turned into my favourite classic song. Even though the lyrics doesnt mean much to me, i can feel the emotional outburst and the strength of the story behind it all. Maybe its just the song also, the freshman. Kinda like me now. Kinda like most of us now.
Merely freshmen in our universities life.
Looking back, did you ever see yourself doing the things you are doing now? Do you think that your future will be like this? What will your future entail? What will tommorow be like? The working world is looming ever closer, and i am getting fearful of the future. I am almost twenty, some of us are already in that "2" digit already. We are getting older, and there is nothing that can stop it all.
I had fun during the few months, learning things that i can say i wanted to learn. But i can also say i didnt want to learn. Like singapore society. Like hell i want to know more about singapore society after a horrendous social studies in secondary school .But i digress. Forgive me.
I made friends that i dont regret knowing. But i made choices that i regret. Such is the life that i lead. I want to lead the life of motivation, but somehow, the motivation doesnt come. The motivation to study hard, and to get a high grade doesnt come. It isnt there. Maybe i am just sick of studying. Sick and tired of datelines, sick and tired of stress.
But if i really get sick of those, then i will amount to nothing in the future.
Sigh. i dont like feeling this confused about the path in my life.
I miss my secondary school days, days where i had no worries about the future. And i can always say that its so far away! i am not even going to JC yet! But that is the past.
Dammit, the sleep deficiency is making me emo.
For the life of me, i dont know what i have achieve in my life so far. Yes, i got grades, but that was the past. And there has been a steady decline. But i am starting to buck up. Having more commitments in hall, so i can at least achieve something in this life i have.
i am not impressive. And i dont try sometimes.
Dammit, i am being too critical here.
My most personal confession ever. Though i doubt many people will see this. It is sad, a posting on the public blog that doesnt get much attention.
Dont mind this random rambling. If you are indeed normal, you would have gotten bored reading this by now. I would if it was me.
I remember i am confused about something / someone. Or at least, frustrated at what that something / someone is doing and thinking. Ah wells, i shouldnt focus so much on the past and move on to the present. I have alot of questions, and nobody, not even the closest people to me know about.
That is the mind of mine. Nobody will ever know what i am thinking. Not until i am either drunk or tired. Haha...
well, i am off for more studying. This silent early confession of mine before the dawning of the exams will be a harbinger of something. Maybe something good, but most likely something bad. Like grades. Shit.
What comes, will come.
Come what may then, future. Just come my way, and i will endure through all your sufferings
I am just merely a freshman.
